Even the Donkey Knows

“Behold, your king is coming to you…humble and mounted on a donkey.” – Zech. 9.9

As the commemoration of Holy Week concluded (representing the span between Palm Sunday and Easter Sunday), I reflected on a sermon I once heard wherein the preacher used details of the triumphal entry that first Palm Sunday to illustrate his lesson on humility: despite all the cheering and hullabaloo, the gentle and lowly king Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a simple and humble beast of burden. (Matt 21.1-11, Mark 11.1-11, Luke 19.28-40, John 12.12-19)

As humans, we desire affirmation and often envy the kind of attention given to Jesus that day. Yet sometimes it’s not about us. The preacher joked that even the donkey understood the fanfare wasn’t for him, but for the one on his back.

Animals are remarkably perceptive, so it’s not a stretch to believe that.

Humans are also perceptive. But we’re likewise careless, impetuous, fickle, and consumed with our own self-interests. You probably know well what happened in the week following that donkey ride. By week’s end, many of those celebrating Jesus’ arrival were silent, hiding, or even among those calling for his death.

Not much has changed in 2000 years. Animals, despite having no capacity for reason, remain extraordinarily perceptive. Humans, despite having great capacity to reason, remain extraordinarily self-absorbed and persist in a perpetual rebellion-repentance-restoration relationship with God. And all those points were on full display during a recent monthlong decampment blending business with pleasure, highlighted by a week in Costa Rica with friends.

Surely everyone traveling to Costa Rica has heard about the wildlife. Even the least amount of research into the area we stayed confirms the prevalence of monkeys (and other exotic animals) running amok around the property; including the possibility these little safe-cracking simians might help themselves to your belongings if the doors aren’t secured. We couldn’t wait to see for ourselves if the stories were true!

There are likewise ample warnings directing guests NOT to feed the animals. You see where this is going?

Many reasons exist not to feed wild animals, including much of what we eat is bad for them. Not to mention doing so only entices them to return for more. More often, and more aggressively.

Consider these firsthand examples.

While I certainly don’t care to snuggle with any, my experience is that iguanas typically mind their own business. In fact, they usually just ignore people or scurry away when we clumsily try to get as close as possible to take their photo. I don’t blame people for wanting to take photos…iguanas are beautiful, fascinating creatures. But sometimes it’s like watching a search warrant execution, except everyone’s wearing sunscreen and flip-flops. Just use the zoom feature, already!

Worse yet, occasionally there’s that one dude to whom the rules don’t apply and common sense persistently eludes. It happened this time to be the same dude who foolishly thought perhaps the friendly poolside iguana, just trying to mind his own business, would instead like a French fry. In pure poetic irony, everyone nearby was treated to several minutes of lively entertainment as Captain Ketchup scrambled off his palapa, squealing like a teenage girl, while the iguana quite aggressively came back for seconds. And thirds. You’ll be happy to know the iguana was fine, and that good old Crinkle Fry there was later heard to say “I guess that’s why we’re not supposed to feed the animals.”

Don’t be that guy.

Then there’s what Alfred Hitchcock tried to warn us about. Loud, obnoxious, and known to suddenly perch on heads of unsuspecting diners or snatch food right off their plate, the birds were perhaps most annoying. Yet giggling guests continue feeding them.

And of course, the monkeys.

It wasn’t uncommon to encounter them in trees throughout the resort. But the sight of dozens scampering across railings on every level of main lodge balconies each morning was like something straight out of Jungle Book. King Louie had nothing on these primates.

In fact, one morning from the sidewalk below, several of us were caught between curiosity and incredulousness as we watched a young lady precariously suspended from her balcony. Holding on with one hand, she dangled part of her breakfast in the other as she stretched toward a monkey on an adjacent railing.

At least two thoughts crossed my mind in that moment: 1) she’s probably someone to whom things like using turn signals, returning shopping carts to the corral, not texting and driving, waiting their turn to exit the aircraft, or not feeding the animals are merely suggestions not to be taken seriously; and 2) I wonder which one of us is going to call the ambulance?

Fortunately, the girl didn’t plummet to her death, wasn’t bitten, and the monkey didn’t eat from her hand.

But our proclivity toward stupidity and the problem of feeding animals persists.

We hadn’t seen monkeys on our own balcony until our last morning, so it was as if they’d read the daily departures log and came to bid us farewell. It was fun watching them drink from the jacuzzi spout and search the veranda for scraps we may have left behind. We personally confirmed they do, in fact, know how to operate the sliding doors. While ours was latched making for an unsuccessful break-in, one did slip in through our neighbor’s door long enough to swipe some sugar packets off their table. Shortly thereafter, I saw his buddy grasping a bag of peanut M&Ms lifted from another room.

Amusing as it was to watch their antics, I was irritated and grew even more concerned for their wellbeing as I watched one on the patio tentatively, yet persistently, trying to eat something unrecognizable, disgusting, and probably not from nature. The impact of careless, self-absorbed humans consumed only with their own amusement continues contributing to the problem. We should instead be part of the solution.

There is hope.

The monkeys there are skittish and reluctant to accept food from people; and the iguanas just want to be left alone. Like the donkey knew the fanfare wasn’t his, these animals know our food isn’t theirs.

Unlike wild animals, humans should know better; we have the capacity to think and reason. Perhaps over time, if we stop feeding them, they’ll be reconditioned (and stop telling their friends where all the loot is). The least we can do is leave them alone and just appreciate their beauty and unique place in nature.

Not everything needs to be about us.

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Special thanks to Cupine Farm and the McCarthys for the cover photo of Jarvis setting the horses straight, and for another memorable trip.

“Please Don’t Feed the Animals” – The Management

*If you’d like to know more about Jesus or the meaning of Palm Sunday and Easter, please contact me. Or consider reading the New Testament Gospel According to John.

Transformation Tuesday: The Heart

This week we’ll celebrate Valentine’s Day, now a largely romantic holiday of debatable history widely thought to have originated from a martyred Christian named Saint Valentine.  Certainly well-meaning in its modern adaptation – I mean, who couldn’t use a little more love, romance, and heart-shaped chocolates in their life? – it’s the human heart that is the focus of this Transformation Tuesday.  

In the figurative sense, hearts get broken, and like other holidays this can be a tough one for many.  In the literal sense hearts can also be broken due to congenital disease. They can also become broken, or defective, as a result of infection, high blood pressure, high LDL cholesterol, diabetes, smoking, simple age-related degeneration, obesity, unhealthy diet, and physical inactivity.  Some heartbreak and some heart problems are unavoidable.  However, as poor decisions and bad relationships can lead to broken hearts, many physical heart problems are likewise preventable; the result of simple abuse or neglect.  

What: Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. (Proverbs 4.23)

How: Be physically active, get plenty of rest, drink lots of water, eat healthy while adhering to reasonable portion control. Or as my friends over at On Target Living say: Rest | Eat | Move. It is perhaps equally as important to avoid those foods, activities, and people that aren’t good for you

Why: The heart is at the center of our being: physically and emotionally. From attitude to energy to relationships, everything else is impacted when our heart isn’t working like it should.

“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” (Luke 6.45)

Make sure yours is healthy, happy, and full of the right stuff.

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.  

Happy Father’s Day!

Wishing dads and father figures everywhere a blessed Father’s Day today. As my friend and author of the book MAN Up!, Mike Winter, recently said, “The best decision a father can make on Father’s Day is to double down on being the man God called him to be in his home so that he has the best possibility of raising godly children.”

And for those who are now without theirs, my prayer is that they simply await a sweet reunion with you in the presence of the Heavenly Father, who is always with you. “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deut. 31.8)

Broken Together: Can Grace, Mercy, Commitment, and Forgiveness Save Your Fairytale?

Listen along to the audio version here.

Have you heard ‘bad things come in threes’ or ‘the power of threes’ in business and leadership? I often use a ‘three points’ approach when public speaking. Conveniently, three timely things helped bring this essay to life: a wedding anniversary, a song, and a holiday. Honestly, I prefer to set this subject matter aside for another time (or not at all) because I know there are some who will get the wrong idea, be hurt, offended, or tempted to judge me. But my mind keeps returning to it, so I’m stuck like a worm on a hook: squirming around…about to be in over my head.

I missed when news recently broke of an affair between two popular television personalities. Other than sorrow over more broken families, it doesn’t impact me. But it is a public and familiar reminder of our overall brokenness. And conveniently helps weave my three points together.

First, my wife and I recently celebrated 32 years of marriage. If you’ve read the ‘About the Author’ segment of this site or heard me talk, you’ll note I reference ‘miraculous’ to describe the longevity of my marriage. A 32-year marriage is somewhat statistically uncommon today. Consider this exemplification: a while back I was catching up with an old military friend. During our conversation he asked how many kids I have. When I said “three”, he promptly and in all sincerity asked, “All with the same woman?!?”

While all that may appear mildly noteworthy, my use of ‘miraculous’ is a bit of an understatement. I’m a complete wretch…which is NOT statistically uncommon.

As such, even though our marriage is still relatively intact, we’ve been through some stuff. Lots of stuff. Thankfully, I am married to an uncommonly gracious and committed wife, and I have a savior who is even more merciful and forgiving than she is.

And both know how broken I am.

Second, Casting Crowns has an excellent song titled Broken Together that I again heard around the time of the ‘breaking news’. Here are the lyrics (choruses eliminated for brevity):

What do you think about when you look at me? I know we’re not the fairytale you dreamed we’d be. You wore the veil, you walked the aisle, you took my hand. And we dove into a mystery.

How I wish we could go back to simpler times. Before all our scars and all our secrets were in the light. Now on this hallowed ground we’ve drawn the battle lines. Will we make it through the night?

It’s going to take much more than promises this time. Only God can change our minds.

Chorus: Maybe you and I were never meant to be complete. Could we just be broken together? If you can bring your shattered dreams and I’ll bring mine, could healing still be spoken and save us? The only way we’ll last forever, is broken together.

How it must have been so lonely by my side. We were building kingdoms and chasing dreams and left love behind. I’m praying God will help our broken hearts align, and we won’t give up the fight.

It’s going to take much more than promises this time. Only God can change our minds.

(Chorus x 2)

I come from a broken home. Divorce sucks. Many of my friends and relatives ended up in broken homes. I’m the last person entitled to sermonize right or wrong ways of handling marriage or relationships. I’m absolutely not condemning anyone who’s had multiple marriages or children with different parents. In no way am I being critical of past decisions, those made beyond one’s control, doing whatever was necessary to stay safe, or any one of 100 other scenarios resulting in fractured families. I don’t know what others have been through, experienced, or might now be going through. Any one of those scenarios could easily be mine.

I write this based on my personal experiences and past. My experience is that while it may be necessary or even justified, divorce complicates everything: finances, raising children, school activities, kids sports, relationships, weddings, funerals, and even holidays. Especially holidays. The first time I ever heard my dad cry was when I was a child and we missed a family Christmas. He tried desperately to manage everything and make it special for us kids, but by the time he picked us up from my mom’s and got to my uncle’s house, they had already celebrated without us. He was crushed.

I’m not suggesting it’s okay to do whatever we want or to be unconcerned with the consequences of our actions. That sort of moral relativism is as ill-advised as being self-righteous. Sadly, both are as pervasive today as in ancient times, and bring me to my last point.

Christmas is coming.

Perfection is God’s standard for salvation, which is impossible for humans. Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus, the Messiah. God’s Son born into the world to be a perfect and final sacrifice some 33-years later. Atonement for an imperfect world.

The only answer to this enormous mess that selfish, unfaithful, broken, untrustworthy humans made of everything is a Savior.

I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Christ. Nothing here is intended to be personal or hurtful. No matter what we think of ourselves compared to others, we’re all equally defective. Each of us is as morally guilty as any other transgressor. “Whoever shall keep the whole law, and yet stumble in one point, he is guilty of all.” (James 2.10); “There is no one righteous, not even one.” (Rom 3.10, Ps. 14.3; 53.3)

Brant Hansen puts is this way: “Whatever anyone’s done to me, or to anyone else, I stand just as guilty. People have lied to me, but I’ve lied too. People have been unfaithful to me, but I’ve been unfaithful too. People have hurt me, and I’ve hurt them.”

Why should anyone be surprised when someone they love does something that hurts them?

Faith is a journey. I suggest the same is true of relationships. “God delights in making something beautiful out of something broken.” – Pastor Don Denyes

Don’t give up!

And don’t miss the reason for the season. “For unto us a child is born…” (Isa. 9.6).

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Hansen, Brant (2022). Unoffendable. Nashville, TN: W Publishing Group. 

Source: Musixmatch. Songwriters: Bernie Herms / John Mark Hall. Broken Together lyrics © Sony/atv Tree Publishing, G650 Music, Pure Note Music, Songs Of Universal Inc. View the official lyric video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAAvPDgKf30

vultures perched on leafless tree under blue sky

Vultures Will Gather

I recently read a passage in the Gospel of Matthew I struggled to make sense of, which is not unusual. There are many things I don’t yet understand about God and his word. But I’m okay with that…a divine Creator completely understood within human reason wouldn’t be much of a god, anyway. A. W. Tozer seemed to relate a similar issue when he wrote, “Evils…will seem evils only because we cannot read the secret script of God’s hidden providence.”1

The passage contained this verse: “Wherever there is a carcass, there the vultures will gather.” (Matt. 24.28)

Coincidentally and perhaps not-so-completely-unrelated, I first learned about Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) in college Spanish one long-ago fall semester. As I write this it’s Halloween time. I’m embarrassed to admit I used to confuse the two very different holidays.

A traditionally Mexican holiday celebrated within the first days of November, Dia de los Muertos is a time-honored observance of both life and death, abundant with bright colors, music, food, drink, and expressions of love and respect to honor the souls of deceased loved ones.

On the other hand, if ever existed any redeeming aspect of honoring saints at Halloween, that’s largely devolved to themes of frightening costumes, dubious behavior, witches, mayhem, and yes…death.

*Not an actual carcass or crime scene

Watch any old western and you’ll learn circling buzzards mean carcasses nearby. There isn’t space here to deep-dive my theological confusion, but it appears Matthew’s passage, like Luke 17, points to the end times and coming of God’s Kingdom. The widespread carnage, stench of death, and vultures everywhere will evidence the judgment.

But wildfowl aren’t the only creatures attracted to death or affliction. Metaphorically, human vultures are often busy circling, fascinated with the macabre and eager to prey on the downtrodden. I once had to fight off a vulturous hoodlum bent on ridding an unconscious victim of his wallet, even as paramedics and I worked to save his life.

And these familiar buzzards: ambulance-chasing attorneys lining their pockets with the currency of others’ misfortune; slippery televangelists milking the last few dollars of unsuspecting God-seekers; heirs historically uninvolved, conspicuously motivated when estates are settled; rubbernecking gore-mongers jamming traffic and compounding mayhem, instead of minding their own driving; or streaming fanatics unable to find anything as entertaining as bingeing the latest true crime show or similar exploitation of human anguish.

Incorrect assumptions, uninformed assertions, irresponsible gossip, careless rumors, and outright slander are especially hurtful, and too often the hallmarks of human vultures in our lives. Unlike the telltale orbit of winged predators, these ‘birds’ are especially hurtful and negligent because their plundering too often happens behind the backs of their troubled, downcast, or otherwise vulnerable prey.

Fortunately, not all are quite so iniquitous. Like colleagues circling your office or siblings dive-bombing your bedroom ready to snatch whatever goods and chattels might be up for grabs upon your departure. Of course, it’s possible you’ve just overstayed your welcome and they’re just waiting for the smelly log jam of ‘dead wood’ to clear…

Vultures will gather. So what’s a cadaver to do?

  1. Live. One sure way not to be a target of vultures is to not be dead. Be physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually alive. Stay busy. Exercise, go for walks, read, pray, listen to music, sing, dance. Enjoy life and appreciate God’s beauty in people and the world.
  2. Love. Few people, even buzzards, wake up in the morning determined to hurt others. Maybe they’re oblivious to the pain they cause, or they just don’t care. Either way, that’s their issue…not yours. We have no idea what may be going on their life or the personal demons they fight. Maybe it’s divorce, addiction, abuse, illness, death of a loved one. Instead of being just another angry bird, be kind and compassionate. There’s a local business nearby that routinely employs people down on their luck or with checkered pasts. Affectionately referred to as ‘reclamation projects’, they help people when everyone else has given up on them. Second chances are part of their organizational culture and something we can all learn from. Everyone stumbles. Instead of throwing the ‘baby’ we once esteemed out with the bathwater, remember and appreciate all the positive things they’ve done. Just love them and give them the chance to keep doing great things.
  3. Laugh. Don’t take yourself so seriously…laughter is good medicine! Jump in a pile of leaves, play games, dress up for Halloween. A youthful heart beats strong and crow’s feet are much more attractive from smiling than stress.
  4. Learn from the goose. Buzzards are solitary, opportunistic predators. Geese, on the other hand, fly together, share responsibility for leading the flock, and care for one another when sick or wounded. That’s leadership 101…and pretty good relationship advice, too.
  5. Lean into God’s hidden providence. It’s easy to set our faith aside when things are going well, but the time to become acquainted isn’t in the midst of catastrophe. Seek to know God better now, and more will be revealed; in good times and bad. Walk by faith, not by sight…God is in control.

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

The vultures didn’t mind the slow service.

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/travel/article/top-ten-day-of-dead-mexico

https://www.history.com/topics/halloween/history-of-halloween

1Jeremiah, David (2014).  Quest devotional seeking God daily. San Diego, CA: Turning Point.

3rd Annual Year in Review

After initially penning pretty much a novel just as introduction, I decided to pour my glass half-full and save the bellyaching opening for a future essay of its own.  I’ll instead focus on this summarized recounting of another year’s worth of life-changing blatherings.  I encourage you to link to each article for a closer look (audio versions available within).  I also encourage you to check out the new Beyond Strength merchandise store! 

Six Foot Cup: “I grieve for what our country has become. No longer a shining example of democracy to the world, we have lost a common sense of dignity and respect. Peaceful protests are one thing. But antagonism has led to months of destructive civil unrest, disobedience, death, and millions in damages. The U.S. is supposed to be the world’s democratic leader. Now we look like a dysfunctional junior high school. Our political ‘leaders’ and elected officials have cast aside statesmanship, diplomacy, and decorum in favor of hissy-fits and name-calling. Taking credit or blaming others for something clearly beyond anyone’s complete understanding takes precedence over doing the right thing.”   

This article was equal parts venting and encouragement. It ultimately suggested the socially distanced coffee meetup to battle social isolation ongoing at the time.  

“There’s nothing quite like sitting down with a friend. Self-care, buddy-check, confessional, solving world problems, venting. Whatever the reason, it’s good and necessary. I love my alone time…but I need people too! Bonus when it’s without agenda or drama or judgment or problems that need solved.”

God is in control. We are not God. Be wary of those who think they are.

Least Bad Option: This article is largely about attitude, motivation, and inspiration.  A quote from Pirates of the Caribbean character Captain Jack Sparrow summarizes: “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem.”  

I met Greg, an amputee, at the gym while vacationing in Mexico.  The ‘least bad option’ had to do with his decision to have his damaged lower leg removed after failed attempts to salvage it.  What impressed me most about Greg (humility and a positive attitude), relates well to Sparrow’s quote and everyday life. “I’ve always believed there’s no sense feeling sorry for yourself…you just gotta pick yourself up by the bootstraps and keep going.” – Greg

Walls and Window Dressings: This one dove deep and is difficult to summarize. It’s about being real, not hiding behind a curtain of double standards or camouflaging your duplicity. 

“Never value anything as profitable to yourself which shall compel you to break your promise, to lose your self-respect, to hate any man, to suspect, to curse, to behave hypocritically, to desire anything which needs walls and curtains.” – Marcus Aurelius (Emphasis added)

”Everything is permissible” – but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible” – but not everything is constructive.” (1 Cor. 10.23)

Moral relativism isn’t the answer.  Be wary of leaders blind or unconcerned to the impact of their actions. 

Paradoxical Conflictions: This is another one that ran deep and isn’t served well in summary.  In short, paradoxical refers to something with two meanings that don’t make sense together: or a contrary opinion.  The subtitle of this blog, Finding Strength in Weakness, is an example. 

Conflict generally refers to a fight or strong disagreement.  

Combined, this article attempts to resolve inner conflict and related paradoxes I feel as a man of faith, usually surrounding interpretations of biblical commandments versus personal convictions.  

Making matters worse, it isn’t uncommon for so-called pillars of the church to be most rigid in their convictions. And the first to confuse them for commandments. You may just need to go read this one…

Memorial Day: Lest We Forget: “We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; For he to-day that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother;” – Shakespeare, Henry V, Act IV, Scene 3.

Remember the fallen…Memorial Day and every day.

Do You Like Me?  Yes No: Today’s success is often measured in followers, likes, and comments.  I haven’t cracked that code, so I can’t help doubting myself or the value of Beyond Strength at times. I want what I do to be relevant and useful. I want to make a difference. It would be nice to be liked.

But as much as I yearn for affirmation, my worth doesn’t come from what I do or how many likes I get. And yours doesn’t either. Our worth comes from God. 

Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes: I found myself wondering if this romper-room dance was really a fun way to teach basic anatomy to children, or just a song about getting old?  

Adulting can be depressing and overwhelming, but we can learn a lot from what we did as kids.  Use this as a motivator to do things to improve your physical, spiritual, emotional, psychological, and social well-being. 

Even if it means running through the motions of Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes a couple times.

Remembering 9/11: Last year marked the 20th anniversary of the September 11th attacks.

Never forget…

Slow Down: “Just slow down. Trust me, it’ll still get done…you’ll still get there.” – Bruce

Slow down, take it easy, and give this one a read.

Finishing Well: With retirement rapidly approaching, I want to finish well.  My good friend and fellow short timer said, “We only end on a low note if we allow it.”

Finishing well means setting aside grievances, knowing what I can and cannot control, and adjusting my attitude accordingly.

Attitude and actions are completely within our control.  

Keep doing great things!

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Shakespeare quote retrieved from: http://shakespeare.mit.edu/henryv/henryv.4.3.html