Garage Sales & Garbage

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Are you a garage sale-er? Maybe it should be garage ‘sailor’, due to the boatload of junk you just scored…effectively undoing the noteworthy progress you made decluttering the other crap you didn’t need.

As I enter retirement, I’ve turned some focus toward trying to declutter, minimize, simplify, and eradicate hurry from my life.

Don’t judge me, I’m only two weeks in.

Having long been an avid reader, burning through books is nothing new. But a couple of recent selections have been borderline providential, making me wish I could turn back time and do some things differently. In fact, applying even some of the concepts to my life from any of the last three or four I’ve read could either elevate my marriage, or end it.

Here’s why.

I’ve done things a certain way for so long that to change now could be too shocking. Personality is formed very young, as are many of our habits and tendencies. While changes can occur over time through significant life events, trauma, or when things happen like ‘finding’ God, basic personality and behavioral characteristics become evident pretty early and stay pretty consistent. Unfortunately, in my case “Once a pack-rat, always a pack-rat” comes to mind here. Pretty sure I got that from my dad.

But people are different.

The character development between the Focker and Byrne families, particularly Robert De Niro and Dustin Hoffman, in Meet the Parents and Meet the Fockers, is a remarkable and hilariously accurate depiction of what I’m talking about. Ultra-conservative, Type-A, ex-CIA agent versus free-loving, free-living, old-school hippie-type.

Behavior and personalty in mind, for me to suddenly clean out my closet and keep only a handful of clothes; outfit a small Honduran village by ridding myself of extraneous shoes; contract a mobile shredding service so we have a four bedroom home again; dispose of the notion that a new RV costing more than our first and second homes (combined) would be better than our cozy, 20-year-old-paid-for-Griswold-mobile; or torpedo dreams of someday living on a lake again or having a cabin up north and a trailer down south might be a bit of a shock to my loved ones.

Don’t get me wrong; I pride myself on having successfully managed a comfortable, modest, conservatively apportioned life as a public servant on a single-income. It wasn’t always easy. There were many times we wondered ‘what could have been’ if both of us had careers outside the home. We ultimately surrendered strong desires to keep up with the Joneses in order to keep a mother at home with her kids. But dang, I want some of that! In fact, I sometimes get a little irritated because I don’t have more of the good stuff like many of my friends. I mean, I’ve worked hard and collected some pretty significant emotional and psychological road rash along the way. Don’t I deserve it?

The answer is no.

I’m not suggesting we should’t have nice things, or that people who do should feel bad about it. To each his own.

As I write this, I’m riding Amtrak’s City of New Orleans back home from an annual board meeting and symposium. I’ve had time to start a new book: Brant Hansen’s Unoffendable. There’s so much great stuff about living a better life by dropping anger and letting things go. I’m convinced much of our anger, defensiveness, judgment, self-righteousness, and envy comes down to the feeling of being denied what we think we deserve and taking things personally. It’s situations like mentioned above when I must remind myself that what others have (do, did, think, feel, believe) is not about me. I have nothing to prove. Hansen says, “When we really believe that, we’ll hardly be quick to anger.” (cf. James 1.19)

I would add “Or get defensive, judgmental, self-righteous, or jealous.”

In his book The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, John Mark Comer wisely points out that being “Reasonably happy is more than enough.” Happiness or contentment isn’t the result of circumstances, but disposition. My selfish-self needs to hear that…often.

Comer also drops these two truth bombs:

  1. Dreaming of the perfect life…poisons our actual life
  2. Minimalism isn’t about living with nothing; it’s about living with less

I don’t pretend to have figured all this out on an 18-hour train ride two weeks into retirement. I’ve known and lived some of this for a long time. But my recent change in status – emancipation from the tyranny of the urgent – allows me to instead now focus on what’s truly important.

Combined with a few necessary changes in attitude and I’m ready to get serious about removing things from my life I no longer need; literally and figuratively.

I’ll start by trying hard to be Unoffendable.

I’ll also work on slowing down more (see my previous article); eliminating excess clothing, shoes, mugs, hats, papers, and other things I don’t need; setting limits and specific times to check emails and social media; and removing a whole lot of other things that cause stumbles, doubts, and distractions.

Maybe I should stay away from garage sales, too.

“[Live] in such a way that your unfulfilled desires no longer curb your happiness.” – John Mark Comer

What are some things you need to get rid of?

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Comer, John (2021). The ruthless elimination of hurry. Colorado Springs, CO: WaterBrook.

Hansen, Brant (2022). Unoffendable. Nashville, TN: W Publishing Group.

Failures & Faith

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God looks not at our failures, but at the sincerity of our faith. The truth of that statement is found throughout history. Consider those honored as ‘Heroes of Faith’ by the author of Hebrews, who despite failing miserably earlier in life, were used mightily by God because of their faith.

Here are a few. 

Abraham, more concerned for his own well-being than his wife, passed her over to Pharaoh as his sister; later, his impatience with God’s timing would lead to hurt feelings and an unnecessary and unpleasant family dynamic.  Moses, long before leading his people out of Egypt, killed and buried an Egyptian, then hypocritically tried to play peacemaker between two of his kinsmen.  Both Moses and the valiant Gideon would doubt their abilities, self-worth, question God’s instruction, and resist their calling. And like many other men, the mighty Samson and King David were both enslaved to passion, self-indulgence, and captivated by beauty.  

Stories like this aren’t uncommon. Industry leaders, CEOs, Hollywood icons, athletes, and everyday people are stumbling masters of imperfection. Yet many contribute greatly and attain high levels of success and achievement. So why is this important, and why now?

Timing and proximity.

For a while now, my pastor has been preaching through the book of Hebrews.  Chapter 11 focuses on triumphant faith. Examining those highlighted as heroes of faith gives me hope…even heroes fail.  But faith endures, and by it they “…conquered kingdoms, performed acts of righteousness, obtained promises, shut the mouths of lions…escaped the edge of the sword, from weakness were made strong” (Heb. 11.33-34; emphasis added).  Their faith gained them approval from God, because faith is evidence of the heart.  And God looks at our heart, not how many mistakes we make.  

But faith will be tested. 

Unfortunately for those who dislike discomfort, the pastor points out that for faith to mature it must be pressed…as olives are to making oil.  Faith is refined (matured) in the process of being crushed.  

It seems failure isn’t necessarily a bad thing. 

I don’t know where you land on the coincidence versus serendipity versus providence spectrum, but just days ago Tim Tebow, a man I respect for his faith journey, encouraged followers to embrace failure as a growth and learning opportunity.  Part of his post read “Failing doesn’t make you a failure”.   While he’s experienced some incredible success in his life, he’s also experienced significant disappointment.  His faith still shines above it all. 

I don’t know him personally, but I expect he would agree that faith is something we experience.   Whether we live to be 100 or our days are cut short, faith is a journey, not a destination.  And sometimes God uses even a short life to make a lasting impact.  

It’s not comforting, but people of faith know that sometimes God’s greater purpose outweighs temporary discomfort. 

“Counting on the future is folly.” – Charles Spurgeon 

We are two years into a pandemic we were told would be under control within a couple of weeks. Many have lost faith in authorities and experts because of their inability to provide consistent guidance or expected results. Don’t count on the future.

Those who lost friends or loved ones to COVID likely had their faith tested.  Unrelated to the pandemic, my family and others close to me have experienced incredible pain due to the unexpected loss of loved ones during that time. Two, in particular, were taken from their young families undeservedly soon. It may be little comfort to those grieving, but each of them lived a life of faith and powerful testimony, leaving behind a lasting legacy and impact.  

Faith is tested in other ways, too. 

It’s difficult to explain the level of anguish and heartache over an estranged child, wayward and spiraling downward; consequences of poor decisions come to fruition near rock bottom.

The olive press of parenthood isn’t always a pleasant journey of faith.  Flaming, blaming, hateful arrows launched from the tongue of a broken spirit aren’t easily ignored. They sew seeds of doubt in even the strongest parent.  

Are my own failures to blame? Whose faith journey is this, anyway?

I’ve had both insignificant and epic failures. I still do. I’m ashamed to admit that I’m not so unlike those heroes of faith mentioned earlier. I’ve been impatient with God’s timing; hypocrisy isn’t foreign to me; I’ve doubted my worth, downplayed my abilities, resisted my calling, and questioned God’s direction.

And if ever a person personified their biblical namesake, it’s this David.

I long for the ‘good old days’, but as I pointed out in the preview to this article, maybe the good old days weren’t all that great either. Still, times certainly seemed simpler then.

I think it was Jimmy Buffett who said that living well is the best revenge. But vengeance isn’t ours to wield and many of us have some letting go to do.

But I see his point.

Living well with a faithful heart, despite our proclivity to stumble, may help today’s days be the good old days we seek.

Trust in the trustworthiness of God.

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Tim Tebow quote retrieved from https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6900445218035089408/

3rd Annual Year in Review

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After initially penning pretty much a novel just as introduction, I decided to pour my glass half-full and save the bellyaching opening for a future essay of its own.  I’ll instead focus on this summarized recounting of another year’s worth of life-changing blatherings.  I encourage you to link to each article for a closer look (audio versions available within).  I also encourage you to check out the new Beyond Strength merchandise store! 

Six Foot Cup: “I grieve for what our country has become. No longer a shining example of democracy to the world, we have lost a common sense of dignity and respect. Peaceful protests are one thing. But antagonism has led to months of destructive civil unrest, disobedience, death, and millions in damages. The U.S. is supposed to be the world’s democratic leader. Now we look like a dysfunctional junior high school. Our political ‘leaders’ and elected officials have cast aside statesmanship, diplomacy, and decorum in favor of hissy-fits and name-calling. Taking credit or blaming others for something clearly beyond anyone’s complete understanding takes precedence over doing the right thing.”   

This article was equal parts venting and encouragement. It ultimately suggested the socially distanced coffee meetup to battle social isolation ongoing at the time.  

“There’s nothing quite like sitting down with a friend. Self-care, buddy-check, confessional, solving world problems, venting. Whatever the reason, it’s good and necessary. I love my alone time…but I need people too! Bonus when it’s without agenda or drama or judgment or problems that need solved.”

God is in control. We are not God. Be wary of those who think they are.

Least Bad Option: This article is largely about attitude, motivation, and inspiration.  A quote from Pirates of the Caribbean character Captain Jack Sparrow summarizes: “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem.”  

I met Greg, an amputee, at the gym while vacationing in Mexico.  The ‘least bad option’ had to do with his decision to have his damaged lower leg removed after failed attempts to salvage it.  What impressed me most about Greg (humility and a positive attitude), relates well to Sparrow’s quote and everyday life. “I’ve always believed there’s no sense feeling sorry for yourself…you just gotta pick yourself up by the bootstraps and keep going.” – Greg

Walls and Window Dressings: This one dove deep and is difficult to summarize. It’s about being real, not hiding behind a curtain of double standards or camouflaging your duplicity. 

“Never value anything as profitable to yourself which shall compel you to break your promise, to lose your self-respect, to hate any man, to suspect, to curse, to behave hypocritically, to desire anything which needs walls and curtains.” – Marcus Aurelius (Emphasis added)

”Everything is permissible” – but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible” – but not everything is constructive.” (1 Cor. 10.23)

Moral relativism isn’t the answer.  Be wary of leaders blind or unconcerned to the impact of their actions. 

Paradoxical Conflictions: This is another one that ran deep and isn’t served well in summary.  In short, paradoxical refers to something with two meanings that don’t make sense together: or a contrary opinion.  The subtitle of this blog, Finding Strength in Weakness, is an example. 

Conflict generally refers to a fight or strong disagreement.  

Combined, this article attempts to resolve inner conflict and related paradoxes I feel as a man of faith, usually surrounding interpretations of biblical commandments versus personal convictions.  

Making matters worse, it isn’t uncommon for so-called pillars of the church to be most rigid in their convictions. And the first to confuse them for commandments. You may just need to go read this one…

Memorial Day: Lest We Forget: “We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; For he to-day that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother;” – Shakespeare, Henry V, Act IV, Scene 3.

Remember the fallen…Memorial Day and every day.

Do You Like Me?  Yes No: Today’s success is often measured in followers, likes, and comments.  I haven’t cracked that code, so I can’t help doubting myself or the value of Beyond Strength at times. I want what I do to be relevant and useful. I want to make a difference. It would be nice to be liked.

But as much as I yearn for affirmation, my worth doesn’t come from what I do or how many likes I get. And yours doesn’t either. Our worth comes from God. 

Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes: I found myself wondering if this romper-room dance was really a fun way to teach basic anatomy to children, or just a song about getting old?  

Adulting can be depressing and overwhelming, but we can learn a lot from what we did as kids.  Use this as a motivator to do things to improve your physical, spiritual, emotional, psychological, and social well-being. 

Even if it means running through the motions of Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes a couple times.

Remembering 9/11: Last year marked the 20th anniversary of the September 11th attacks.

Never forget…

Slow Down: “Just slow down. Trust me, it’ll still get done…you’ll still get there.” – Bruce

Slow down, take it easy, and give this one a read.

Finishing Well: With retirement rapidly approaching, I want to finish well.  My good friend and fellow short timer said, “We only end on a low note if we allow it.”

Finishing well means setting aside grievances, knowing what I can and cannot control, and adjusting my attitude accordingly.

Attitude and actions are completely within our control.  

Keep doing great things!

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Shakespeare quote retrieved from: http://shakespeare.mit.edu/henryv/henryv.4.3.html

Finishing Well

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When I recorded the video preview, this article was intended as motivation to finish well as I close in on retirement. I had no idea the next two weeks would be a collision of parallels between finishing a career well and finishing a life well. With the unexpected passing of my mother-in-law, and two other funerals the same week, the connection was unmistakable.

Contextually, hints of resentment started percolating and I didn’t like it. Save for a few disappointments, I’ve had an extraordinary career…I refuse to spend the last few months of it embittered. A little self-reflection revealed two primary issues conspiring against this emerging, unwanted disposition.

Too many decisions are made for the primary benefit of those making them. That’s nothing new. What is new has been the perfect storm of social, civic, and public safety upheaval, resulting in declining sentiment toward policing and melodramatic policy decisions driven by political activism. Progress is good; change is necessary. But not when it benefits some to the exclusion of others. What once was among the noblest of professions is now one in which contempt and disrespect for those sworn to serve and protect has become an acceptable norm.

The criminal actions or irresponsibility of a few must not diminish the honor and distinction with which the vast majority of public safety professionals serve. Many who have dedicated their lives to protecting and serving are exhausted and anguished. The current environment creates the potential for a profession that once attracted the altruistic and humble to instead draw those primarily motivated by power and authority. That’s not progress. But neither is it something I have control of.

The second issue is unforgiveness. I have too-long held onto hard feelings about lost opportunities. Two were blatant instances of favoritism, bias, and partiality; the others less obvious, but no less disappointing and no less wrong. Unchecked, these types of inequities create an environment where people don’t feel psychologically safe, and some simply stop trying; helpless to change things and afraid to speak out.

That’s where I eventually found myself. Hurt, ruminating, and waiting for an apology that will never come. Empathy and healing aren’t high on the list of priorities for the leader, husband, wife, father, mother, or friend unwilling or incapable of apology. Another thing I have no control of.

What is within my control are my attitude and actions.

In his book The Socrates Express, Eric Weiner quotes Gandhi as saying that no man “…takes another down a pit without descending into it himself.” Said another way by a good friend recently as we lamented current events, “We only end on a low note if we allow it.”

Avoiding low notes and pits by controlling what I can, and letting go what I can’t, seems obvious. Accordingly, I choose to finish well; maintain a positive attitude; avoid engaging in biased or self-serving decisions; and continue speaking out against injustice…socially and within my family, organization, and my profession.

And I choose to forgive…with or without an apology.

Besides, believers are urged to “…not grow weary while doing good” and “…not lose heart.” (Gal. 6.9).

My mother-in-law, Joy, never grew weary of doing good. She was one of the kindest, gentlest, most genuine people on the planet, who lived out her namesake every day. I had the privilege of speaking at her memorial, during which this portion of my remarks both applies here and convicts me:

“I say this with not an ounce of pride, ego, or self-serving motive; this woman, this most beautiful and tenderhearted of human beings, adored me.  An adoration I never deserved.  She was one of the few people I have ever known who truly loved unconditionally.  No matter how many times I messed up, was abrupt, spoke unkindly, or hurt her daughter in some way, she never stayed angry or judged me. Instead, she was always the first to forgive me. I will never understand why she felt that way about me, or why a guy like me was so blessed to be a part of this wonderful family…” 

My mother-in-law lived well, and despite her untimely passing, finished well. I’m a better man because of her.

Likewise, notwithstanding some disappointments along the way, I’m also a better man because of the organization I’ve been a part of for nearly 30 years.

I mentioned two goals in the preview video: finishing well and decluttering.

Finishing well means setting aside my grievances, knowing what I can and cannot control, and adjusting my attitude accordingly.

Decluttering means ridding myself of unnecessary junk…literally and figuratively.

In some ways, my profession and organization are unrecognizable today. That’s not necessarily a bad thing…it’s just not necessarily my thing.

Nonetheless, I choose to run with perseverance to the very end.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us…” (Heb. 12.1)

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Weiner, Eric (2020). The socrates express. New York, NY: Avid Reader Press.

2nd Annual Year in Review

As the calendar turned two years ago I quoted David Jeremiah, who wrote: “A compassionate man does not stand detached from the sufferings of others.  Rather, he steps into the world of the hurting and feels the pain and anguish of the one suffering.” The world has been hurting, and many suffered greatly in 2020. Maybe that quote would be better served to start 2021.

The premise behind beyondstrength.org is that strength is more than just being physically strong. It’s also about finding strength in weakness, and helping others get strong, be strong, and stay strong. Thank you, 2020, for proving that premise to be necessarily self-evident.

There’s no sense lamenting the things here we’ve lived ad nauseam the past 10 months via revolving news networks. Instead, I will continuing the fledgling tradition of recapping my blatherings from the past year.

Surely you read, enjoyed, related to, and benefited from all of my writings the last 12 months?! On the outside chance you missed any of these ‘life-altering’ posts, here’s a summary of Beyond Strength articles from the dumpster fire of a year called 2020.

Cause for Delay (video): Starting the year already behind schedule, I bought time by sending a video update from the island of Lesvos, Greece. I was there with a short-term mission team providing humanitarian support to refugees at Moria Camp. It was an amazing experience and added valuable context to my life experience and walk of faith.

The Leadership T.R.A.P.: The article used the acronym to compare and contrast Task versus Relationship focused leaders and Authority versus the Power-focused leader. Tasks tend to be one-dimensional…just get it done. But tasks and overall mission are best accomplished when relationships built of genuine care for your people come first.

Free Samples of Forgiveness: I get bogged down dwelling on my mistakes or how I’ve been wronged by others. Counselors call that ruminating. My struggles in this area are rooted in difficulties accepting and granting forgiveness. I’m committed offering forgiveness more freely and being grateful for forgiveness I’m granted. “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matt. 6.14-15

March Forth: What better month than March to march forth toward fulfilling your purpose, achieving your goals, or making the world a better place?  I suggested some ideas like starting a blog or other venture; starting a reading program; volunteering; or getting your fitness goals on track. How did you do?

Well That’s Fabulous: Chances are you’ve seen or heard the abbreviation ‘wtf’. If seeing it makes you uneasy, don’t be. It stands for Well That’s Fabulous. WTF was a discussion about the disturbing trends being witnessed within the pandemic. This is an unprecedented crisis; no one person, organization, or government has all the answers. People should stop blaming others; stop trying to advance personal and political agendas; stop arguing about who should have done what, when; and stop trying to be an infectious disease, economics, supply chain, business, or political expert. Instead, start being more caring, compassionate, cooperative, humble, and kind.

Conspiring for Good: Election interference and virtually everything surrounding COVID-19 generated rife theories of conspiracy or malfeasance that continue to thrive. Whether conspiracy theories do more harm than good or serve to help maintain proper balance in the world, it can take years for the truth to be revealed…and even then there will be those who doubt. Conspiracies make for great entertainment, but also cause great divisiveness. Commit to conspiring to do good.

Be the Solution, Not the Problem: Here were a few ideas I shared to be more of a solution than a problem.

  • Make room for God in your life. When we understand our own unworthiness compared to a Holy God, we tend to be less of a problem for others.
  • Stop claiming the misfortunes of others as your own in some attempt to justify living however you want, or as an excuse for your own bad behavior. “Let your light shine before others…” (Matt. 5.16)
  • Embrace diversity. Enable diversity to foster and thrive by treating everyone with dignity and respect.
  • Take ownership of your mistakes and shortcomings. Owning your mistakes is solution-oriented; blaming others makes you part of the problem.
  • Pick up after yourself; leave things better than you found them; say please, thank you, and I love you more often.
  • If you see someone struggling or in need, help them. Saying to yourself, “It’s not my problem” is part of the problem.

Heard, Understood, Acknowledged: An essay about the challenges of interpersonal and organizational communication. Sometimes it’s not what I say, but my delivery that sucks. Like other challenges, there’s probably no easy answer to solving communication problems. But I have found timeliness, openness, transparency, and over-communicating helps. Can you hear me now?

Gains without Pain: There’s something to be learned from pain in our lives, be it physical, emotional, psychological, or otherwise.

  1. Recognize its warning
  2. Protect the injured area(s)
  3. Strengthen surrounding structures that are weak
  4. Properly address and treat the root cause
  5. Don’t bury, numb, or mask it with medication, over-indulgence, or risky behavior
  6. Avoid it when it’s causing damage or grief

As we move on from 2020 into the new year, I pray you’ll have a Happy(er) New Year, you’ll continue to follow along, and that you’ll make a positive difference in others’ lives.

“A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives.” – Jackie Robinson

Keep doing great things!

Get Strong. Be Strong, Stay Strong.

Be the Solution, Not the Problem

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“What’s your problem?!?” I know you’ve been asked that. Maybe you’ve uttered those words yourself, right before realizing things were about to go south. It’s a legitimate question, but one that’s usually asked in the wrong tone at the wrong time.

I have been asking myself that question for weeks now. While I usually ask it when struggling with my thought life or downswings in my mood or attitude, recently it’s been related to my lack of motivation to write an article. The solution came after talking to my friend. He experienced similar ‘writers block’ as he contemplated the much more significant purpose of drafting his brother’s (and our bandmate’s) eulogy. He tells me he awoke in the middle of the night and just started writing.

History repeated itself in a sense, for as chatting with him was part of my solution here, he likewise helped me move from problem to solution a few years ago when he convinced me to join his band to help me recover from a dark time in my life.

Problem: They needed a drummer (I didn’t play drums).

Solution: Now I do.

It would be easy to swing at the softball floating toward home plate courtesy of the pandemic right now. After all, the current medical-social-political-economic finger-pointing circus supplies ample example; there is no shortage of those who are part of the problem. The good news is, there are just as many who are working hard to be part of the solution.

Besides people who barely passed high school math suddenly knowing more about infectious disease than actual scientists and doctors, people who are part of the problem do things like this: litter; don’t scoop their dog’s poop; procrastinate excessively; blame others; engage in cronyism and favoritism; fail to learn from mistakes; are inconsiderate or entitled (typically related); leave their shopping cart parked where cars are supposed to; pretend to care about people.

They may also fail to recognize (or care) they are part of the problem.

Here are a few ideas to be more of a solution:

  • Make room for God in your life. When we rightly understand our own unworthiness compared to the righteousness of a Holy God, we tend to be less of a problem for others.
  • Stop claiming the misfortunes of others as your own in some attempt to justify living however you want, or as an excuse for your own bad behavior (cf. peaceful protesting vs. arson, looting, assault, and property destruction). If you want to be a voice and strength for the oppressed or weak, live honorably in such a way that brings about positive change. “Let your light shine before others…” (Matt. 5.16)
  • As Dr. Samuel Betances used to say, stop counting heads and start making heads count. Embrace diversity. Enable diversity to foster and thrive by treating everyone with dignity and respect. We are all humans created in the image of God. I don’t believe supporting one race, gender, orientation, or ethnicity has to be to the exclusion, debasement, or detestation of another; you don’t have to be ‘one of’ to ‘stand with’. Fostering a culture of diversity involves being part of the solution.
  • Take ownership of your mistakes and shortcomings. Learn from them. Everyone stumbles and falls short. Owning your mistakes is solution-oriented; blaming others makes you part of the problem.
  • Pick up after yourself; leave things better than you found them; say please, thank you, and I love you more often; be a good (nobody’s perfect) human being.
  • If you see someone struggling or in need – mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually – help them. Saying to yourself, “It’s not my problem” is part of the problem.

Bystander intervention, being kind, considerate, polite, old-fashioned, or a Good Samaritan. Whatever you call it, consider this: “Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, ‘Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,’ but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?” That’s from the second chapter of James, where he relates that faith, when not accompanied by works, is dead. Even the secular rock band A Perfect Circle seems to get it. Consider these excerpted lyrics from ‘Talk Talk’:

You’re waiting…On miracles…We’re bleeding out
While you deliberate…Bodies accumulate Sit and talk like Jesus…Try walkin’ like Jesus
Don’t be the problem, be the solution
Faith without works is, Talk without works is
Faith without works is Dead, dead, dead, dead
Try braving the rain, Try lifting the stone, Try extending a hand
Try walkin’ your talk or get the f**k out of my way

The Christian band Casting Crowns likewise addresses not walking the talk in their song ‘If We are the Body’:

But if we are the body, why aren’t his arms reaching? Why aren’t his hands healing? Why aren’t his words teaching? And if we are the body, why aren’t his feet going? Why is his love not showing them there is a way?

There is so much more I need to say about this subject, but I’ve already overstayed my welcome.

If you are a so-called leader who plays favorites, cares only about what benefits you, or creates problems where (or because) none exist, you’re part of the problem. Leadership involves solving problems, not creating them.

Be part of the solution.

Get Strong. Be Strong. Stay Strong.

Lyrics retrieved from https://www.lyricfind.com